Monday, November 23, 2009

All [He] Wants for Christmas...

Atticus tells me that he wants a flame thrower for Christmas. (HA! In your dreams, son.)

But that's his answer every time I ask.

Anyone have any idea how I can give him a "flame thrower" without actually giving him a flame thrower?

Be creative. Think outside the normal parameters. I'm talking about the kind of thing my dad would come up with: a miniature three-legged stool glued inside a cup (a stool sample); a wooden circle with "TUIT" printed on it (an excuse breaker, as in "as soon as I get around to it I'll do _____").

Remember, this is a family friendly blog, so keep it clean.

14 comments:

annie valentine said...

You could always hire a carnie to come to the house for an afternoon. So cool.

Mrs. Organic said...

Couldn't you somehow rig marshmallows to shoot out of an old canister-type vacuum?

Dainon said...

A couple of cans of Lysol and a match work great! It will throw flame about 3 feet! (It works great for torching ant hills, cats, G.I. Joe action figures, etc!) Here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rfe3hYI7wko

Aquanet hair spray works well, as does WD-40, but Pam is the best! It stays lit after you take the match away!

Gerb said...

I would get him one of those long lighters - like the kind you use for a BBQ. It's a flame thrower... just a smaller scaled version.

BTW, I love that he wants a flame-thrower.

sue-donym said...

A catapult, a marshmallow and a lighter.

ALthough my first answer was the same as Dainon's.

NiHao said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gBAKL3AeyGE

Carrot Jello said...

I'm with Annie.
Bring someone home that has thrown flames.
Like a fireman or something.

Michelle (Swindler) Jones said...

Get a Clay Aiken doll (or other very gay celebrity) and build a little catapult that goes with him. Wulah! A Flame[r] Thrower.

Sister Pottymouth said...

Annie: What a great idea! Know any carnies?

Mrs. O: No need to give him ideas like that. He'll actually recreate them.

Dainon: I should report you for attempting to contribute to the delinquency of a minor. But the video was still awesome.

Gerb: I might have one of those somewhere. I'll have to look.

Sue-donym: Ooooo...flaming smores!

NiHao: Don't you dare send him that link. That's all I need.

Carrot: I thought about doing something like that, but how does one go about getting a flame thrower for the day?

Michelle: Thanks for my guilty laugh of the day. Awesome.

Melody said...

Go to Army/Navy surplus. Buy him a flame thrower... it won't work. It will be too heavy to carry. The glory, the glitz, the glam will soon go up in a flame of hard cold olive drab reality.

Sister Pottymouth said...

Melody, your wit is stunning! I will be laughing all night long at the idea of a flame of hard cold olive drab reality. Thanks!

Geo said...

I'm with Melody.

Or you could just make a flaming dessert one night and let him light it.

Jillybean said...

I think he would get along really well with my 9 year old son. Last week he asked our neighbor if he could blow up their cat.


Word verification - "crash"
It somehow seems appropriate.....

Kadeem said...

Look EVERYWHERE for a little figurine of Super Mario after getting a fire flower.

He looks like his

http://old-wizard.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/fire_mario_smb3.jpg