Thursday, August 23, 2007

Here Comes the Sun

Or should I say son?

My eldest is having one of those days today. He dawdled until the last possible second this morning before finally getting ready for school; he came home and lounged around watching TV and bugging his brothers after school instead of doing his jobs; and he fiddlefarted around in his room instead of getting ready for bed. When he came out to get on the computer and discovered that his user is disabled, he began his conniption fit.

"Why can't I get on the computer? S-- was just on the computer."

"As I explained earlier, you haven't cleaned your room, finished your homework, practiced your guitar, or completed your daily jobs. Until that's done, there will be no computer time."

"But S-- didn't get his practicing done today and you still let him on the computer."

"That was your dad's decision, not mine. If you have a problem with it, go talk to your dad."

(huffily) "Fine."

Instead of taking up the issue with Phil, A-- proceeds to turn on the TV while I'm brushing S--'s teeth. When I'm finished, I return to the living room, unplug the TV, and lock the plug in the lock box.


"A--, that's been a rule since last year. If your jobs aren't done, you don't watch TV."


"I know. That's really sad that you decided not to complete your jobs earlier. Now you'll have to miss it."


"Don't even start with me on that one, A--. You've watched TV every day now for several weeks. All summer, in fact. Don't give me this garbage about not watching TV for weeks and weeks."


"Not even, son."

Now the little self-righteous tirade begins.

"You know, I think you're determined to do everything you possibly can to make my life miserable."

(I refuse to answer.)

"And you're not doing anything to persuade me otherwise."

(Still not speaking.)

"I don't want to talk to you ever again."

(Given his attitude at that moment, I was thinking that'd be nice.)

"You know, Mom, the scriptures say that 'men are that they might have joy.' Well, I'm not feeling any joy at the moment."

(Thinking, but not saying, "Yeah, buddy. The scriptures also say 'wickedness never was happiness.' Bite me.")

He decided to "punish me," I guess, by sulking in his bed. No loss on my part, I'm tellin' you. Put that attitude to bed and give it a rest.

In other news, scattered s#%t showers are still present in my neck of the woods, but the umbrella seems to be holding up. My dad is doing much better. The situation with Phil's mom is still up in the air. The family has a lot of tough decisions to make in a short time, but everyone is working together and making the best of things. The shocker situation is something we'll be dealing with for a while. All I can say about it is that it's one of those things you never, ever want to see happen in your family. However, I can see the Lord's hand in everything that has happened, past and present, preparing us to handle this storm. We will be fine.

Thanks to everyone for asking how we're doing and for checking in from time to time. It means a lot.


AzĂșcar said...

Fiddlefarted? That's a new word for me and I think I like it.

Elizabeth-W said...

Men are that they might have joy!!!! Love the attempts. I would have been laughing by that point, giving the "you seriously aren't going to quote scripture to ME?" look. Glad things are perking up a bit. Let me know what I can do for ya'.

The Daredevil Mom said...

I think you handled the whole thing PERFECTLY. I would have been sorely tempted to get into a screaming fight with the young man. His intellect is a strong weapon. I think my therapist was right: it's much easier to deal with a stupid person than an intelligent one. Virtual high-five for being a great mom, even if it was through gritted teeth!

And I officially love the word fiddlefarted.

~cari~ said...

"Men are that they might have joy"... that's one smart boy you've got there! My oldest son tried something like this once. He was thinking that being asked to pick up his things on Sunday was breaking the Sabbath and brought out the scriptures and proceeded to read all these scriptures on keeping the Sabbath day holy. He thought he got us but then my husband took his scriptures and read, "Honor thy Father and thy Mother..." It was beautiful.

I'm so glad things are getting a little better for your family. So glad your dad's doing better! It's so hard when parents start to get older. Keep your chin up!

Kengo Biddles said...

Wow. I like how you handled it. Must take notes for the up and coming terror that is my 2 year old...

Pappy Yokum said...

It's interesting - I could have changed the names and this conversation could have been word for word between my 17-year-old daughter and me. She has been doing it since she was about 10.

Fiddlefarted - I think my mom used to say that one. Truly funny.

wendysue said...

fiddlefart is my favorite new word too!

Lyle said...

The stars must be aligned! I just went the rounds with my own daughter, who thinks she has the power to ground me from something [but she won't tell me what it is,] but I'm sure gonna be sorry for making her load the dishwasher.

Sketchy said...

Yeah Mom! Where can I get me one of those lockboxes?

b. said...

I grew up with fiddlefartin'. It's a great word.
Don't you love how kids twist things around?
I need one of those lock boxes too.
I've been thinking about you, glad you posted an update.

Gerb said...

LOVED this post. It hit a bit close to home, as I'm sure you can imagine.

Glad things are on the up-and-up. We love you guys over here.

compulsive writer said...

More hugs--virtual this time. And as one queen of making life miserable to another may I just tell you I really got a kick out of that exchange. If they only realized how much unjoy they were throwing our way...

p.s. I just wanted to tell you how much I love your new do.

pflower10 said...

You need to write a parenting book! I love your stories about A***.

I'm glad to hear the surprising storm is not getting the best of you! Stay strong!

Deborah Gamble said...

We love Mythbusters!

Did you see the one titled "Son of a Gun"? They proved that it was impossible to impregnate a woman by a shot gun shell ricocheting off a man's you know and landing in a woman's abdomen.

Family viewing at its best!

elasticwaistbandlady said...

My grandpa always said "Stop jumping around like a fart in a skillet." I've never actually seen a fart in a skillet, but I imagine that it doesn't smell very good.

I hope that you can see clearly now that the rain has gone and that its going to be a bright, bright sunshiney day! I just made that up. Maybe I should set it to music?

Queen Scarlett said...

You have a new do? SHOW and Tell! ;-)

I also like your word fiddlefarted. You are one hilarious mom... we should all get to jaunt around in your head.

Julie said...

QS: Same "do" as before but shorter. My hair grows so fast that every time I get a haircut it's a dramatic change.

Physcokity said...

I love this story